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Several years ago i came up with a theory that smiling ruined my pictures! ruined the way i look and everything else! I would never say” cheeeeeeeesee “even if the photographer would insist a zillion times. And I took a million pictures looking darn serious, indifferent disinterested or if i was polite enough would make sure to smile without showing my teeth..its like smiling but not exactly because smiling makes me ugly remember?

Well flash news is the pictures looked terrible anyway if they were supposed to look terrible! and i had a collection of pictures over the years that showed a girl who seemed to be in another place. When others where happy. acting the mood and the moment.

At some point I went back to all those pictures and tried to figure out what they portrayed. They didn’t necessarily show that I was a depressed little girl, or that I had esteem issues and a unexisting confidence. Some of them were probably pretty and I looked like a model you know how their faces look in pictures but I din’t want to portray something that wasn’t me anymore


“The world will define beauty, differently, it will define beauty as it wants, my kind of beauty is the genuine and happy one”                                     Flor

So I started on with forced smiles, plastic smiles that looked like someone had photoshoped the smile into my face! then I realized it still wasn’t real but I was trying anyway. So if you’re a girl you also probably know that angle that makes you look prettier and stick to it so I was all plastic smiles and best angle, to my disappointment I still looked unbelievably ugly (in my mind) that I thought I would simply avoid pictures this time.

Then I started to ask myself what matters the most, if it’s that my pictures portrays who i am, and what I feel at the moment or the love I feel for life and people in it, people around me and people in the same pictures with me, or if it mattered that the pictures would look as in a magazine but would show me someone I don’t recognize when I was supposed to be looking at a reflection of myself.

So the new me is all smiles and I don’t care if my big nose is all over the place when i smile, I care that my pictures show who I want people to see when they look at me. I care that they show happiness because so many things go wrong but not all of them do. and my story is a happy one. I care that I want to be remembered as I am and not an image of the flawless me I pretend to look like, i care that i believe am beautiful no matter how differently the world defines beauty.


fake smi

Ms Florence


24 thoughts on ““THE SMILING THEORY”

  1. I used to think I looked ugly too when I smiled for photos . But then as you said you realise its who you actually are that matters and to say the truth everybody looks beautiful when they smile from their hearts. Lovely post as usual!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. You do look lovely when you’re laughing but I know what you mean, I always avoid having my pictures taken because I hate the way I look. So do show your beautiful smile and don’t worry about it. You’re right just the way you are.😀

    Liked by 3 people

  3. I went through a no-smiles phase also, because I hated the way my forced smiles looked. But then I learned how to smile naturally in pictures (it involves actually being happy) and it really helps. You’re beautiful, and I’m glad you feel confident now. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I love this reflection piece! It speaks volume because it is so important to be happy in the moment and YOU ARE NOT ALONE so you sharing lends a voice to others who may have felt or still feels the same about their photos. I do it too sometimes, sometimes I peep that I am starting to llok a little older especially around the eyes when I smile and so sometimes I become overly critical about a pic but real rap a genuine smile is sooooo beautiful all by itself as it reveals layers of beauty from within! Keep shining beautiful!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, am glad you can relate i think we just keep comparing ourselves to people we think look flawless and the funny thing is from what I’ve heard from my prettiest friends they also are not that confident they may be insecure or hate features on themselves we think are perfect, the real thing is basking in who you truly are, believing your beautiful and feel lucky to be part of this amazing ride called life! xxx


  5. Being relaxed makes a photo, and if you feel nervous, smiling doesn’t help. You’ll still look stiff, still look awkward.
    I like to think of a terrible joke before taking a photo. It relaxes me and makes me laugh.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Love this–whatcha-talkin’-about? You have a beautiful smile, so let its true beauty shine through!

    I’m enjoying your blog so far, especially how you share your sense of humor in your posts. I get what you’re saying about feeling self-conscious about how you look when you smile or laugh, as I’ve been there, too. I’ve had to learn smiles for every occasion, but every single one of them is mine. And there’s a certain unmistakable attribute that comes through when you forget about how you look and just laugh and savor the moment!

    Also, I have just nominated you for the Liebster Award. To accept it and find out more, visit the link to my acceptance post: https://onesunnyplace.wordpress.com/2016/04/01/one-sunny-place-liebster-award-2016/

    Liked by 1 person

    1. thanks Robin! thats heartwarming and am glad you like my posts and my blog in general! I’ve already been nominated for the liebster award so what am going to do is answer your set of questions and post it on my blog i’ll send you the link thanks alot warm smiles!!!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Vince

    Reminds me of when i was a kid. I hardly smiled when taking pictures. Maybe because i dont really look good in pictures. Even as i became an adult i still could hardly smile until i found a way to take pictures at a particular angle and with just a little smile and a good lighting just makes it ok. So today i can now take pictures that look good. And i prefer selfies.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. I remember someone reminding me to smile once upon a time in my younger years. This person didn’t say it to be annoying. They told me why my not smiling might be giving others the wrong impression. I looked like I had a chip on my shoulder; which wasn’t true at all.

    Then I had someone tell me that it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile. This also made sense to me, and no this person wasn’t trying to make me angry or nothing either. Both these people cared, and wanted me to be my highest and best.

    That’s what I hope you are striving for too, in photographs and otherwise. First impressions do mean more than you can imagine; especially if you know you’ll be cross later when you suddenly realize that what you thought you were portraying is not what you actually put across.

    You are a beautiful young lady. You seem to have personality, and I know that you know the camera doesn’t lie…or does it? When you feel your best about yourself, you look your best–on camera and off. It’s wonderful if we’re beautiful on the outside, but long after all our “pretty” has faded, it’s the inner shining beauty that people will see. You will see it too!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are beautiful too! thanks alot for sharing your story and for reading my post! first of all its amazing when i find out most people have felt or even still feel the way i felt at some point in life, then its great to learn we can grow out of things that don’t defines us as we are. when i made this post most of my friends told me they realized i really never smiled in pictures even when i was happy, and my picture galleries show it too, its like am learning to love myself and embrace who am no matter what, and things i thing are flawed on my physical self don’t matter as much as the life , happiness and gratitude inside of me! thank you so much again xx

      Liked by 1 person

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